Firstly thank you for taking the time to read this blog, I have been a little naughty not keeping up with my blogs as much as I should do, but other business ventures and things have got in the way but I promise that I will keep on it as much as I can!
This blog is about something that I have gone through recently myself so I wanted to share it with everyone, as not only do I believe a lot of people go through it but it is a form of therapy for me (as well as lots of glasses of Martini but that’s a next subject! In fact I encourage you to sip some kind of alcoholic concoction as you read this, I won’t judge you!)
Every human has a breaking point, or most should! We have expectations and needs when it comes to relationships with our friends, family and especially the person that you are in a relationship with or have feelings for.
If you don’t have set up expectations or a point of no return than that person will simply continue to disappoint you and not try to change for the better for not only you but for themselves.
I’ll be the first to admit I have liked some A class idiots, in fact this particular guy was the CEO of dickheads I’m sure of it, because as smart as he was he was so immature when it came to relationships and being the man that I needed him to be. I’ll admit that it is partly my fault for even entertaining such a man in the first place (and I know that’s what some of you were thinking as soon as you saw what I wrote don’t lie.) He had his flaws but there were outweighed by so many other things about him that I did like and that was what I concentrated on mostly (I know some people can relate to what I’m saying), furthermore I saw potential in him that he could (operative word COULD) be a great boyfriend.
Like the old saying goes “a man will only get away with what you allow him to” and that statement is so true, its funny as women if we feel disrespected by say a work colleague we would be quick to raise our eyebrow, look down on them and tell them what we think about them because in your head you’re quick to think “I know this buck toothed, big forehead, ass sucking cow who can’t even do THEIR job is not trying to speak down to me or have my name in their mouth? They must not know about me and who I am, let me tell them real quick…” but when it comes to the person we are in a relationship with we turn mute…what happened to your feistiness? Lost your tongue? Oh now you don’t know what to say?
Trust me I’ve been there, I’ve sat there on my couch making a mental list in my head about what I’m going to say to this fool before he got to my house, how I was going to say it and how empowered I would be. But as soon as my doorbell rang, and I saw him, he would kiss me and walk in, that was NOT how it was played in my head, and I feel like Spartan kicking myself in my chest for not sticking to my word because once again I allowed him to get away with something that had upset me and he was none the wiser.
Just like when you are dating, you let a man or woman know what you will and will not stand for when you are in a relationship, its funny when you do actually enter one how much you compromise or put up with because you love them, but one thing that should NEVER be lost is the love that you have for yourself.
Never be a doormat for another person, because they never bought you from Ikea or Homebase so what makes them think it’s acceptable to treat you that way. I know plenty of people that say “I’m done; its over I swear I’m through with him/her” then a few days later I’m seeing a picture of them acting like a happy couple on Twitter/Blackberry or Facebook ….really? I just want to punch them in the throat.
You have to ask yourself at what point do you say enough is enough? How many tears, arguments, lonely nights (I could go on here but you get my point) do you have to endure before you realize that this particular relationship that you’re in is not healthy for you? I refuse to be miserable just to stay in a relationship my happiness means more to me than that. You have to be selfish at times when in a relationship if you’re efforts and feelings are not being reflected by the person that you are with then its better you just let them go.
You must be sniffing skittles if you think I’m going to be the only person fighting for a relationship to work when you’re not even lifting a finger to call or text me to see if I’m alright or make time for me, because the last time I checked I didn’t ask MYSELF out you asked me to be your woman so don’t rage me (getting slight rage in the chest right about now) you can’t be the man AND the woman in the relationship and vice versa. Its better you let them go and find someone better, life is too short and there are too many good men for me to be wasting my time with one that’s not even ready to BE a man.
Kisses & Bumflicks