Hello Vexers and Vexettes,
The 11th November 2015 marked 7th years of Vex In The City which still amazes me that 7 years ago I created a blog with no intentions or vision of what I wanted to do with it, but week after week it quickly grew into something that I loved and now 7 years later is something that I seriously want to do full time!
I thought I would take the time out this time to have a little heart to heart with you all about the last 7 years since the birth of my blog and where I am today. SO..get a cup of tea with some custard cream biscuits or if you're anything like me...a glass of wine and sit back because I'm going to give you the truth, the whole truth so help me God!
7 years ago I was 21 (gosh I feel old) I was out of university, recession had just started so beforehand I had huge dreams of when I graduated that I would become a probation officer which would allow me to have a steady income and become independent but in reality...I was working in Sainsbury's supermarket which upset my ovaries. I wasn't supposed to be wearing this AWFUL burgundy uniform working on the tills asking people if they had their Nectar card, this was not the dream that university had sold to me when they said having a dream would better my chances of a £25,000 salaried job. I was sitting on a till for hours at a time, packing people's food for them bored our of my skull. On top of being in a job that I hated, I worked in a Sainsbury's where my friends and family attended regularly..I wanted the ground to swallow me on on a regular basis. I can not tell you the amount of times I prayed for a power cut or electrical fault so that I wouldn't have to go to work.
Everything was great social wise though, I had a lot of friends, was regularly going to Corks Wine Bar (I miss that place), and was in a great relationship with White Zinfandel Rose wine (don't laugh).
What wasn't great at that was the relationship that I was, we wasn't at a great place, constantly arguing and my womb was telling me that he was cheating on me but I just couldn't prove it....yet. But I was so young and naive I didn't have the guts to leave him, in my mind I knew that things weren't great and a bunch of roses but looking at other relationships around me we weren't that bad and like I said I couldn't prove that he was cheating on me but my spidey sense were going off like crazy. Anyway...finally this fool slipped up and I was able to prove my womb right and found out that he was indeed cheating on me..and I..flipped...out. I mean Angela Bassett "Waiting To Exhale" moment, but I couldn't burn his car and clothes because I didn't want to get arrested over no stupid ass man. The end result was that we broke up...but I was still raged. I was angry that he betrayed me, that I was stupid enough to stay with him even though I knew deep down that he was being unfaithful, I was angry at the butt ugly buck-toothed gremlin that he cheated on me with, that I had to explain to my friends that we wasn't together which meant I got that same "he doesn't deserve you" speech. I'll be honest I really wanted to punch him in the face with a baseball bat covered in nails..yeah I know you'll be thinking..damn Delia-Rene that's a lot but it's the truth.
I was back to being single..and that meant I had a lot of time on my hands, time that usually was being wasted on that cheating fish. I truly say that it was God's intention but one night I just had the inclination to start writing, not for any particular reason but something within told me and so I did. I have this thing..don't laugh... but when I finish a relationship or friendship depending on the reason I will write that person a letter, not with the intention of giving it to them ..ain't nobody got time for that we're not pen pals, but as a form of release and therapy for myself. Writing an letter is a good way of releasing all your emotions, and saying all the things you necessary wouldn't say to a person face to face..unless you're like me and have a lethal mouth and words can cut someone like a blade (high 5 woop woop).
Within this time, I got a new job as a receptionist at a hospital and luckily there was quiet times so I got a notepad and began writing whatever came to my mind or things that I had experienced. It quickly became a hobby for me, so I typed some of them up and began to write them initially as Facebook posts to my friends and family. I quickly got feedback to how much they loved what I was writing about, at those times the notion of blogging was a myth. I didn't know of many people that were blogging or what a blog consisted of, so I made a Facebook group instead so that if people wanted to they could read all the foolishness that I was writing.
At first, the group consisted of mainly friends and family and I was happy with that because they knew me and my humour so I was glad that they enjoyed what I was writing, however the more I wrote the more I would notice my group number was going up. I still remember the first time I had 100 followers I was so surprised because the first thing that came into my head was "There's 100 people out there that want to actually READ the things that I have to say?" after that point it's easy to say...I was hooked. I found myself writing more and more, especially when I was at work and I was supposed to be doing my work I was there writing away in my notebook, I couldn't wait to get home and type up what had come to my mind that day or evening and see the response once it was up!
When my blog reached 1000 followers I realised that maybe this wasn't just a hobby and something that I was actually good at, people would email me how much they enjoyed my blogs, how I spoke about the things that they were going through, I made them laugh and encouraging me to keep with it and until 2011 I did.
My grandparents passed away within 4 days of each other and to make it worse it was the week of my birthday..and my whole life fell apart. Those that are close to me can vow that I am not one to cry...ever and if I do cry it's because it's a sign that I'm extremely angry and want to hulk smash someone into the ground or because I'm near a serious breakdown and because I don't cry often when I do...it's emotional and I can't stop.
When my grandparent's passed it's like I became a zombie, I didn't know how to function or think and the last thing I wanted to do was blog, so I didn't. Days became weeks and weeks became months and before I knew it, I hadn't blogged in over a year.
But luckily throughout me grieving I had some amazing friends and family as support and writing wasn't my only talent I as starting to dabble in acting, directing and script writing. I began learning that craft and become involved in theatre so my blogging took a back burner and although many people followed my blog...when I was acting many didn't recognise that I was the person that wrote Vex In The City which I liked because I didn't want to be seen as bait..that's not cute.
However, my blog and my consistency in writing took a hit and too this day it's something that I'm still trying to recover from. I'm glad that my time away from blogging lead to a plethora of opportunities, over the last 4 years I began working within education which has been the most eye-opening, challenging but rewarding time of my life I have quickly moved up and now finally in the job I always wanted as a Head of Year 11 in a secondary school!
As well as getting the job I wanted, my script writing got me the opportunity to not only create a web series on Youtube but it got picked up by Sky Living TV and this year I saw my name in the credits as a writer which is something I am extremely proud of.
Within the last few years the world of blogging and vlogging has evolved so much, people are now making it a full time job and making a career of it which I think is phenomenal and just shows you how quickly the world and technology is evolving. 2 years ago the notion of Snapchat was a myth and now people look like you like you're crazy if you say that you don't have certain social media accounts.
For me the biggest change was with Facebook, they changed how we was able to interact and control our Facebook group which meant that the interaction I was getting before with my followers had changed. I was battling with having a full time job and trust me working a school is a Monday to Sunday type of job so I didn't have the time used to before that sneakily write blogs or content so it decreased how much content I was putting up, and like I said people were now writing blogs left,right and backside centre.
However people were still writing and messaging me to say how much they missed and loved my blogs and found it funny, and I never lost the urge to give up on my blog or my writing. I realised I stifled myself when I got into a full time job because having a job in education meant I had to be mindful of the things I wrote about. I couldn't be flinging the words penis, dick and vagina so freely because if my Headteacher or even worse a student had seen it I would have a lot of explaining to do and a new job to find quickly. But I realised I couldn't allow my job to stop me being honest with myself and writing the things I wanted to, even though its great to have a pay check I couldn't let it define my character and my talent so I began writing and blogging again.
Because of my years of inactivity, it's only natural that my followers have dropped I was used to seeing hundreds of people read my blog and it's been an interesting transition coming back but it's also been amazing how many people STILL come up to me saying how much they love my blog, how much they used to read it and are still showing me support and this is part of the reason why I love doing what I do.
I've given myself 2 years to be able to get the momentum back up and work hard on not only the blogging but everything else so that I can make Vex In The City bigger and better than it was before. It will take patience and consistency from myself but I owe it to myself to at least try, so to everyone that to this day STILL reads my blogs, reposts, retweets, emails me I truly want to say thank you because without it I wouldn't have the belief to carry on after so long.
Sorry for this essay please feel free to raise a glass and cheers YOURSELF because the past 7 years isn't just a celebration for myself but to everyone that has followed my blog from day one or even if you just begun reading I thank you!
I had a glass or 6 on the 11th November at home as you can see in the picture I'm not going to lie, but I'm ready to put the work in, please feel free to email me if you ever want me to write about something in regards to sex,life or relationships, because if you loved what I was doing before...you haven't seen nothing yet and NEVER STOP DREAMING AND WORKING TOWARDS IT!
Kisses and Bumflicks